My dear friend,
You were so lucky to have such a wonderful mom, and to have her for so long. She was such an exceptional person, and was admired and loved by so many people. I know you will always miss her. Please try to take comfort in knowing that you did everything possible to make her last months as comfortable as they could be. I so admired the strength and honesty you two shared during that difficult time.
Love, Sue

​

​

Jill,
My heartfelt sympathy for you and your family.
With each new day, may the light of healing shine gently upon you and bring you peace.
Pamela

​

​

Jill,
Someone so special can never be forgotten. Thinking of you and your family and remembering your mom.
Love,
Jack and Annie

​

​

We can never really know how many people are touched by the beauty and love in one life. Your loved one meant so much to so many. So sorry for your loss. I am so sorry to hear my favorite teacher is going. She was special.
Joann

​

​

I am my mother’s garden. Her loving legacy. And time can’t touch the many gifts she gave- they live in me. -Ellen Brenneman

 

Jill,
Your mother will be with you in the lessons she gave, the life she shared, and the love she showed. Hope your memories of her will comfort you and bring you peace.
Love,
Gene + Kozue

​

​

Dear Jill,
Support and comfort are just other words for the love and good wishes that surround you. Your mom will be missed.
Love,
Mavis

​

​

People were just naturally drawn to your mother. She made a remarkable difference- and she’ll never be forgotten by those of us who were fortunate enough to have known her. Hope knowing she’ll live on in others’ hearts will help keep her close to your heart as well. How fortunate I was to have Miss Andersen as my kindergarten teacher and Mrs. Harris as a lifelong friend! She was a very special lady!
With Sympathy,
Gayle

​

​

As you grieve the loss of someone you loved so much, wishing you a peaceful place, a sheltering space where your heart can be safe from the sadness and know nothing but comfort. So sorry for the loss of your mother. You were such a wonderful daughter and her best friend!
Love,
Katherine

​

​

Jill, Tim, & family,
You’ll always remember your mom’s caring heart, and all of the ways she was giving and kind. And when you fool happiness deep in your soul, you’ll treasure the love that your mom left behind. Thinking of you at this sad time and hoping that time will ease your sadness, and that memories will bring you peace.

​

​

So sorry for your loss of the beloved Fern. Thinking of you and sending so much love your way. Knowing Fern and Sweet Pea are together causing trouble brings me joy!
Love you!
Meghann, Pat, & Henry

​

​

Jill,
I am so sorry to hear of Fern’s death. She was special – kind and caring to all. She was fun to be around. Bless you!
With love,
Edie

​

​

Dear Jill & Tim,
I heard that your mom passed. I wanted to let you know that I’m here if you need anything. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Fondly,
Nette

​

​

Jill and Tim,
I feel so privileged to have had your mother in my life, she was such a special soul. I will also miss my favorite Dane, and I loved her! I am so sorry for the loss of your mom.
With deepest sympathy.

​

​

Dear Jill-
My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family in the days and weeks ahead.
Love to you all,
Pati

​

​

Jill,
I will always remember your mom being so much fun while we were growing up. Such a nice lady. My prayers are with you during these difficult times.
Adalea

​

​

Dear Jill & Dr. Carmody,
We are very sorry to hear about your mom (Fern), please know you remain in our thoughts & prayers. May God comfort all of your hearts today & always.
Sincerely,
Leo & Jen

​

​

Dearest Jill and Tim,
Although no words of sympathy can ease the loss you bear, still, may you find some comfort knowing others truly care.
With all my love,
Patty

​

​

Dear Tim, Jill, & family,
I am truly so sorry for the loss of your beloved Ferne. I am honoring her and thinking of all of you, today and always.
Love,
Sharon

​

​

Fern couldn’t have had a better daughter and family. She loved you with all her heart. We will miss her.
Love,
Margaret, Patty, GeorgeAnne

​

​

Jill,
Just want you to know I have been thinking of you and your mother. But now she is resting in peace. Life goes on. God bless you.
Vera

​

​

Dear Jill and Tim,
We are so sorry for the loss of your beautiful mom. May the memories you treasure bring you comfort and peace. Our love, thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. We’re sure she got a warm welcome with a drink in hand from my dad!
Lots of love-
Michelle and Don

​

​

Jill,
Your mom had the best daughter who could not love her more. I hope you continue to share wonderful stories with about her with me!
Julie

​

​

Dear Jill,
We will no longer hear your mom’s sweet voice. Over the weekend, Anita told me Ferne had passed away. The last of the old gang that I knew is gone.
Love,
Bruce

​

​

Dearest Jill & family,
Thinking of you! I was so sorry to hear about your beloved mom! It doesn’t get any harder to bear than our moms. Sending you love and our deepest sympathy.
Larry

​

​

You have lost someone so special,
We want to keep our loved ones with us forever, and it hurts so much when forever comes too soon. The loss is so great. Suddenly acceptance is required. No permission asked. What if the spirit of your loved one has not left you, but has moved inside your heart to live, never to be forgotten? Once we love someone, that person becomes part of us and remains with us for as long as our memory of them lasts. Treasure your memories now. Try to focus on the time you did have. Let the blessings that you shared bathe you with love, encourage you with comfort, and inspire you to go on. In the silence of your loneliness and as you struggle to adjust to this loss, please know that you’re being remembered often.
With deepest sympathy for your loss,
Joe & Audrey

​

​

Jill,
What a wonderful mom you had in your life. We are all better people for having known her. I’m sure the moment she passed the world stopped – she was that kind of lady. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
Love,
Joni

​

​

Dear Jill & family,
We were saddened to hear of your mother’s passing. She was a lovely, elegant lady who raised one of the most joyous people I have ever known. May God bless her and all of you.
Love,
Vicki and Nick

​

​

Jill,
Thank you for the opportunity to meet your wonderful mother, Ferne. I always enjoy the joyful visits and to see the sparkle in Ferne’s eyes. You keep me in laughter. Please take care, XOXO to the dogs.
With much appreciation,
Ruby, RN

​

​

Dear Jill,
We are so sorry for your loss and know Ferne is in a better place! You are in our thoughts and prayers. Love,
Tom & Family

​

​

Dear Jill,
No one can comprehend the loss that you feel, the sadness that you must be going through, and yet, warm thoughts are reaching out in hopes that you will know the strength and comfort that this wishes you.
In sincere sympathy,
Claire and Laree

​

​

Dear Jill and family,
My brothers and I adored her. She was beautiful inside and out.
Margie and Bill

​

​

Jill,
Your mom is still with you, in spirit, love and in who you are.
Love,
Q

​

​

Jill & Tim,
So sorry to hear of Ferne’s passing. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
John + Mo

​

​

Jill,
you and your mom surely did this. She will travel on safely surrounded by love. And she’ll help you everyday.
Blessings, dear lady,
Carole

​

​

Jill,
How fortunate to help your mother calmly transition. She got to spend many happy times with her grateful and supportive daughter.
Love,
Joseph

​

​

Dear Jill, Tim, Elizabeth, James, and families-
I am so sorry to hear about Auntie Ferne – but I will always remember all our good times – Our trip to Hawaii, singing, dancing, the famous piano playing – Such a special lady with spirit that will endure. I am so lucky to have had her in my life. We will certainly miss her – but such great memories. Thoughts and Prayers are sent your way.
Love,
Tim, Cindy, Zach, and TJ

​

​

Dear Jill,
Your mother was my Kindergarten teacher and also my very favorite. I will always have a special place in my heart forever.
With sympathy.
Sincerely,
Elton and Marge

​

​

Dearest Jill and family,
I was deeply saddened to hear of your dear mom’s passing. What a beautiful lady both inside and out. What fond memories so many of us have of her through the years. A Kindergarten teacher is the closest person to children as they venture out into the world. That time is vivid in my mind. I can see the round wooden tables, the smell of clay – the feel of it as well, the thick crayons, the white paste and the sweet teacher who loved us. I particularly remember the feel of the gold star on my forehead during nap time. I’m honored to have known your mom and had her in my life. She is remembered with warmth and love. Blessings to you and the family,
Sandra

​

​

Jill and family,
May the gifts of your loved one help console you now, and fill your heart with comforting warmth. With deepest sympathy.
Love,
Sally & John
 

Dearest Jill and family,
I am so sorry that I was unable to make it to your Mom’s memorial. It was on my calendar from the moment you announced it. I have been having neck and shoulder pain for two weeks. It was/is pretty uncomfortable and such couldn’t make it. I called the restaurant and asked them to give you a message. I have the feeling you may not have received it. I appreciate all the beautiful photos you’ve posted of your beautiful mom. I think I’ve already shared some of my memories of her with you. I am so thankful I visited with her at our 30th HS reunion. We also shared some notes back and forth. I know you will miss her earthly presence but how lucky you were to have her. I feel that way about my mom as well. She passed away at 72 – too young. My dad lived to be 95 and lived with us for four years. I was with both of them when they passed and found it to be a great blessing and comfort to have had their presence. My mom was a cosmetologist too.
Love,
Sandy

​

​

Dear Jill and Family,
From the moment Ferne opened her classroom door in 1943, she remained a special person in my life. Fond memories filled with laughter and friendship continue to linger in my mind. I recall Ferne wearing her sailor cap as we marched around the class waving our little American flags and proudly singing Patriotic songs, to her wearing a chef’s apron now serving up a belly full of chow and laughter alongside your dad. In 1957, I was employed at Western Sierra Labor Co. next door to cheery Cruiser’s Inn. Along with your mom came Grandpa Jim who did our office maintenance. Jim frequently arrived bearing a special surprise for the girls as your grandma would send him off with a warm plate of her delicious Ebelskivers and homemade jam. Newly wed in 1958, we occupied an apartment at 4655 Augustine., furnished by our lovely landlady. Returning to college in 1969, Ferne became my role model when finally completing the teacher credential program in 1973. Late bloomer! Thus, it is with these early memories of your mom and so many, many more to follow that come flooding back, bringing a smile. Living life with a zest, many hats, laughter and glam make her a truly memorable lady. Ferne, like a song always remembered, showed me a way to live life to the fullest while having fun.
Fondly,
Joy

​

​

Dearest Jill and Tim,
I have had so many dear thoughts of you and your family. That you included me in the celebration of your precious mother will be one of the memories I will treasure beyond whatever comes. That your Mom included me- became a part of me and the piece of how I see the world. Ferne was my second mom. She was everyone’s second mom- Masons say “it” is all in “plain sight” (yup-yup-agreed). There stood one of the great souls we are privileged to have in our lifetimes, and all of us are the better for it. Jill you have so much of her in you. I remember you speaking at your Dad’s service and how gracious and poised you were. I felt the great silence of love as you spoke for your Mother. No one spoke- people walking down the street were also moved to quiet. One boy (on a skateboard) got off and walked past the garden. Tim, you spoke of numbers (47). 4 + 7 = 11 in angel numbers means that they are present. They were there… so was your Mom. Jill, you are right in your knowledge of being dearly loved… you are so much her child- so much her daughter. Ferne was always there for me. In my dark days and healing process- she sheltered me and gave me a lightness of being that reminded me of the joy in life. She listened… she made ma a child again so I could hope, laugh, and remember to live. She was a gifted healer and a “real” person… ageless beauty. There are so many memories and happy thoughts its hard to compile them all. You are so much a part of them. I have been so lucky (blessed) to have had such wonderful people to guide me. Keep believing Jill- your precious Mother hugs you everyday.
With love,
Lori

​

​

Dear Jill and Tim,
I am thinking of you and I know that nothing that I write will help you at this time but I was going through my diary which began in Pleasanton where our relation began and I thought the following might shed a little bit of humor of her past life and how much of an influence she had on my life. #1 I drove up to the school on my last day and parked next to a V8 Ford just like mine, same color, so I went in search for its owner. I chased it down to Fern- Needless to say a girl from Iowa and one from Kansas. We bonded immediately. She took me in and her mother treated me so warmly. I never felt lonely. Chet was shipped overseas at this time. We would go down to the USO to help and entertain ourselves. There she met Buzz but she didn’t tell me she was dating him. Seriously. He would get tickets to events out of the base and she would include me (to big entertainers). Ferne and I were the chaperones. The next time I’m made aware of is their wedding. I didn’t know how Ferne did all this big wedding dinner! She could handle anything! Then Chet’s ship was sunk at sea and I left Pleasanton, only to return when Chet was admitted as a Law student at Stanford. We couldn’t keep housing in Palo Alto so we would go over to Pleasanton and spend the weekend with Ferne and Buzz. Time went on and then Jill showed up. We held a party at our first house, when Buzz made the announcement there was to be another “Harris”. He wasn’t sure of what is was because Ferne didn’t show. At night we had drinks in the garage because your grandma didn’t approve of drinking. So your grandparents and my mom and dad sat in the living room! I shall never forget your mother and hope and pray we will meet again to hear her sing, and laugh at all our good and goofy times.
Love,
Irene

​

​

Some lives are like a song we know we’ll always carry with us. Thinking of you as you remember someone so loved. With loving thoughts and fond memories of your mom.
Sincerely,
Joy

​

​

Jill,
Hi Theo’s Grandma! It warms our hearts that you keep us in your thoughts. Thank you so much for the amazon giftcard. They are the best. We just ordered some things for Genevieve, and we should receive them tomorrow. We’re sadded to hear your mom passed, and we’re greatful to have met her beforehand because she was truly lovely. But as you said, “Hot Foot” got his “Blondie” back, and that’s what really matters. We’d love to attend her memorial if you send us details. Please keep in touch, extended grandma.
With love,
Genevieve, her mommy and her daddy

​

​

Dear favorite teacher,
You were such a special teacher! You were a great influence on my life. I’ll never forget the night we stayed overnight with you and I walked in my sleep. Didn’t we have fun at recess when you played with us? Did you know we live on the farm where the school house was located? If you ever come to Harlan I’d love to have you visit us. Your mail is very precious to me- thank you for remembering me. Thank you for giving me enthusiasm as part of your teaching. Keep in touch.
Love,
Margaret

​

​

Hi Jill,
Just heard about your mom. She was such a special lady. The enclosed photos was of my husband Larry Lund’s kindergarten class. I was in her 1943/44 kindergarten class but have no shots. She was Miss Andersen then. Looking forward to seeing you soon! I will be at the Celebration of Life and so will Margery Bernard Bupp from Las Vegas and Jay Von Moos Wagnon from Pleasanton. They were both in kindergarten with me!
Gayle

​

​

Dear Jill,
I loved the parties she and Uncle Buzz had. We always had such a good time. Auntie Ferne was the perfect hostess, not to mention a good cook! And, she was fun to be around. I look at the picture of her with the Bunny Ears and just smile. That was so like her. Always adding a little something to make the day brighter. You remind me of her in so many ways. At my Mom’s memorial I mentioned Aunt Ferne never missed a birthday or holiday (well, sometimes she did but would always make up for it). One of her favorite things to send was “White Shoulders”. It quickly became one of our favorites. Every time we smell it we think of your Mom. I wish I had gotten the chance to see more of her over the years. We go on with our lives and soon so much time has passed where did it go? Which is one reason I did Mom’s memorial the way I did. I had blocked so much of my childhood out after Dad passed away I really couldn’t remember much except what was in pictures. I didn’t want to appear selfish but wanted to remember those that had passed on and the few that were still there. Because I knew I may not see them again. Nor would I be able to tell them “I love you”. Everyone I mentioned had an impact on mine and Lori’s life. Whether it was good or bad. I hadn’t seen Mom in several years and was just waiting for a check to come in and I was going to go to California to see her when she left to go be with Dad. And, even though I hadn’t seen you or Aunt Ferne in several years I’m glad I was able to see the both of you and tell your Mom I loved her.
Native American Prayer
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
Love always,
Janice and Tiana

​

​

Dear Jill,
Thank you for including me in your Mom’s celebration. It was joyous, and haunting- you and your lovely family sharing stories under the magnolia and oaks. I lost “it” when Liz told of never seeing a real card in the mailbox again. I lost “it” when you read of Ferne now being closer to you than ever, without the sight. We miss our moms. Ferne was glamourous. I loved her satin wedding dress. They don’t get any better. Except for one thing- her daughter. Jill, you and your mom inspire me to rally and make someone happy if can’t be happy myself. It is in giving that we receive, and there is no better way of giving than bringing people together with music, food, and primary colors. Such memories help us laugh and rejoice, to dance through life and know the greatest power of all is love.
Love,
Vicki

​

​

Dear Jill,
Thank you for sending me the invitation for your mom’s gathering. I have been hoping to be able to attend, but I don’t think it will happen. Still hoping for last minute changes, but seems unlikely. I have been thinking of you and your mom so frequently over the past year. Marianne kept me posted. I have so many wonderful memories that, to this day, make me smile. I remember birthday parties when we were 5 years old, and 6 years old and… I remember going out to the bar when your dad was working. As a little girl, it was fabulous to see. I remember your mom with her larger than possible smile- always. Yikes- I could go on and on. You, like I, were blessed with a wonderful mom- and one who was around for more years than most. People say “well, at her age, of course you knew she was going to go…” Yes but after having them for so long- we sort of expect they’ll be around forever. And- in our hearts- it is true. I still go to the phone nearly everyday to call my mom and expect her to walk in the door.
Love,
Gayle

​

​

Dear Jill,
It was our pleasure to know your mother- she made us both feel welcome in the neighborhood. She really loved life- she showed it in everything she did from day to day. We have learned from her. Our Sunday morning was the highlight of the week- she would always be there to listen how the week went. It is an honor to have known your mom.
Love,
Loree and Curt

​

​

Dear Jill,
We received the very creative folder informing us of your mom’s declining health, illness, and subsequent passing yesterday. What a lovely remembrance. WE remember her fondly although we kept in touch only at Christmas. Marry, of course, has memories of your mom visiting when he was a child on the farm there in Harlan. She, of course, was visiting the adults but she had a way with children, he remembers. When our son Jeremy was 16 we lived in Hayward, CA. We all went over to visit Cousin Ferne at her business one Saturday. When she took us outside to the fenced area she locked the door, leaving her keys inside. (The door locked automatically). We pondered long and hard how to get out of the situation. Jeremy said he could climb that fence and go for help. Dubious, your mom said that if he could he could go to her business partner’s house and get a key. And climb it he did! As I recall he returned shortly and we all went inside. Your mom referenced that incident after thereafter. We know from experience that you don’t just miss a loved one at their immediate passing. There may be times yet when you think of checking on her or “asking mom”. I’m sure you’ll always recall the good times. What a blessing those memories are! Thanks again for the memory folder. WE want to share it with Jeremy, who still remembers climbing the fence.
Fondly,
Dottie